CottonAndy Magazine - Fuzzy Peeps

CottonAndy is a monthly magazine of news, reviews and research on strange phenomena and experiences, curiosities, prodigies and portents, all of them related to a Belgian eccentric widely known as "the Andyman". Having first appeared on a television show in Belgium about three years ago, he achieved instant notoriety with his famous slogan, "A girfriend's miscarriage is a blessing for life." Religious and political institutions were appalled at the seemingly immoral stance of the (at the time) 25 year old male, but the public was wild about him. Why? They loved the "breath of fresh air" he brought to the lame Flemish tv environment; he was "so honest, so spontaneous"; elderly ladies faint-heartedly claimed him to be "the ideal son-in-law".

In the months following the show, he made numerous other appearances on television, even venturing as far as Holland and Germany. Teenaged German girls in particular were extatic about the young lad. "Wir lieben sein Kopf" one could often see printed under his cranial experiments (see picture below). After several years of petitioning and lobbying at the Belgian federal government, a law was finally passed which allowed the thousands-strong fanclub to publish the monthly CottonAndy, which is translated into several languages, such as German, English and Afrikaans.

The next step, the Andyman claims, is to enter the lucrative business of private manned spaceships. He is not daunted by such names as multi-billionaires Paul Allen, Jeff Bezos or Richard Branson. "My head is bigger than theirs," he jests, "and I don't think they've ever given any." However, one is never quite sure if the Andyman is telling the truth. For example, he has been heard to wish to overturn the Belgian and Dutch monarchies, to give aid to Iran's nuclear ambitions, or even to attempt the murder of the myriad of little boys who hold their thumbs in the Dutch sea dykes to keep Holland from flowing under. Well, I guess it is fair enough to state that his girlfriend's miscarriage was a blessing, after all.

posted by Paxjorge @ Thursday, June 08, 2006